It's the same things your whole life. "Clean up your room.", "Stand up straight.", "Pick up your feet.", "Take it like a man.", "Be nice to your sister.", "Don't mix beer and wine, ever.". Oh yeah, "Don't drive on the railroad track."
Wasn't that raccoon some hardcore Halloween material! Ewww, the "Battle Shit"! The elephant man! And NPH going badass! Harold and Kumar's trip to White Castle is nothing short of wild adventures and inappropriate jokes! Kickass comedy!